July 4th would have been my 10th wedding anniversary and I’m sitting here in the most beautiful place in Santorini with one of my best friends (who ironically attended my wedding). It’s amazing what a decade can teach you and how much your life can change. In these 10 years, I have lived in NYC, moved to Chicago, had two baby boys, launched and closed a business (T&J Designs), turned blogging into a full-time job, gotten divorced, and now I’m currently in Greece soaking up the sun and reflecting on my life. Life doesn’t end with divorce. There are two ways to move forward, one in a depression of the past and the other to embrace change and to want more. I chose the latter and have spent most of this year improving myself, traveling and thinking about what it really means to know what I want.
For the first time in a long time, I can say I am happy. Work is going well, my travels spark happiness and motivate me, and my kids are happy and transitioning well in this new life of splitting their time between mom and dad. With this, I hope to bring a better Jen into any relationship and whoever I chose to be with has to love everything about me and the same vice versa. Acceptance was a huge struggle in my last relationship and I definitely have spent time reflecting on what I did wrong and what not to bring into the next relationship.
Divorce or a breakup doesn’t mean you are broken, it purely means the partnership broke, and it’s ok to move on. Gosh, last year was tough and I never really spoke out about how hard it was to negotiate for my life (cause that is how it felt). It wears you down to your bare bones and leaves you feeling empty and wondering how it got to that place. It took some time, but we are both doing well, and in the end, our kids were always #1, so they never really knew the difficulties of the process. Of course, moving the boys back and forth from place to place is something that still impacts them, but we work together well to make sure the boys know that they are loved and they had nothing to do with it. I can still say that I’ll always love their dad, but it’s just changed. Going through pregnancy and birthing two children is something that connects two people forever. Love can change and that’s ok.
The past 6 months I spent it getting to know myself and doing all the things I love which really focused on travel and spending time with my boys when at home. My Greece trip was my honeymoon trip to myself in celebrating where I’ve gone and motivates me to move forward with a more open heart and appreciating what I’ve experienced. As I sit on this gorgeous hotel overlooking the water, I am happy.
My exact bathing suit here
I am still gone for until next week but I wanted to write a post on what I’ve been thinking about and as you follow along with me on Instagram you can understand a bit more why I’ve been traveling more. If you are going through a hard time with your relationship or personal life, remember that in a year, so much can change, but be ready to make a change and that scared feeling is a good thing. Sometimes the best things in life are those that are scariest.
My life online is snippets of the best parts of my life. I still struggle with sadness, anxiety, stress and day to day problems, but overall I try to be as open as possible that I appreciate all that I get to do and I continuously work towards being a better person and working hard to continue to be able to live my life the way it is.
As I look back to the last ten years, I’m excited to look forward to the future. Through ups and downs, life is incredible when you choose to make it that way. xoxo
Read more about posts about me below by clicking the image: