10 Things Women Shouldn’t Do

10 things women shouldn't do, Langham Chicago pink suite, chicago bloggers, Windy City bloggers, Jennifer worman, red soles and red wine, women support women, women support women quotes, life is a journey quotes, life quotes, life is a journey not a competition quotes, personal growth, reflect, self reflection, making friends as a woman, real talk, advice for women, support women, friendships with women, how to be a good friend

*Bright pink suite at the Langham! 30% of the proceeds go to breast cancer research and only until the end of the month! Book it soon!

This post is positive and things I think we get stuck on and I think about when appreciating my friendships. Let me know any feedback you have xoxo.

{1} Apologize for things that aren’t needed or for being yourself. How many times a day do we say we are sorry? For things that have nothing to do with us or for just being you. I think it is great to have empathy, but I don’t believe in apologizing for things that aren’t needed.  Of course, I say “I’m sorry” when my friend is going through something, it helps bond us and let her know I feel for her. But it’s the everyday things where, if someone cuts in front of you, or gives you a disapproval look or bumps into you and you say, “I’m sorry”.  Or situations where you are not at fault. I think, we as women, take upon ourselves to want to help others, but let’s not apologize for things that don’t need to be and learn other ways to say things. And ladies, I’m tired of apologizing for being me, if I overdress and lead with honesty, I’m not apologizing. I DO apologize when I have done something wrong or if I think about things and realize I should, that’s when I do.

{2} Enter a conversation by putting ourselves down for the way we look. So I started noticing this A LOT lately. It’s something I try not to do, but I’m usually overdressed and I make people uncomfortable at times. I DO NOT care if you are overdressed or under as long as you feel great! I have tons of friends that are casual and tons that are all glam. I love dressing up but do not want others to feel pressured to do the same. Don’t start a party or enter a conversation by saying, “Sorry, I look like crap, I feel underdressed, oh I look so stupid”. Gosh, I’ve heard these statements so many times and it’s the first thing someone says! We need to kinder to ourselves and how we speak to ourselves and when we approach others. If you love comfort, embrace it! If you love heels, embrace it! It’s all welcome and style is an individual thing.

{3} Be exclusive. There are cliques and always will be. From as little as preschool to adulthood, I’ve experienced this in every aspect. We should be inclusive, not exclusive. I have a wide range of friends, from different backgrounds to age groups and I really do strive to know all different types of people. I welcome strangers (or at least I do really try and if I have snubbed anyone I didn’t know it was totally by accident) and meeting new friends is something I LOVE doing. This isn’t to say I don’t have groups of friends, but I also don’t control their actions. So I focus on myself and what I can do to make sure people meet and be kind and friendly. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a Scorpio, so if you have wronged me or been mean to me, my attitude totally changes LOL.  So I’m pretty sure those that are on that side know it!

10 things women shouldn't do, chicago bloggers, Windy City bloggers, Jennifer worman, red soles and red wine, women support women, women support women quotes, life is a journey quotes, life quotes, life is a journey not a competition quotes, personal growth, reflect, self reflection, making friends as a woman, real talk, advice for women, support women, friendships with women, how to be a good friend

{4} Be jealous of friendships. THIS IS EXHAUSTING and a side of female friendships that I really dislike. It is so childish, so selfish, and ladies, just check yourself when you feel this. And have a conversation with yourself on how to change this “jealous” behavior.  Friendships should be based on being friends and caring about each other. Not about invites, or who sits where, or who went out without you. Instead of hating a friend for excluding you or being jealous, figure out ways to either invite them out or remember that your friendship should be based on a deeper level and if you do spend great times together, that’s what matters.

In the last two years, I’ve talked about this a lot, and still see it. It’s sad and childish and I don’t tolerate it. So I can only control myself so I don’t allow myself to be caught up in the middle of this.

{5} Judge women by their cover. I write “judge” a lot in this post. We don’t know what someone is really like until you talk to them. You, of course, will have first impressions, but a full story about who they are is only known by having a conversation. Try to do that before framing someone into a box.

{6} Judge to have children or to not and to ask about more children based on gender. To have children is a sensitive subject, to have a second or third child or to have a boy or girl is, but asking someone about having children is ok but judging them for it is not. Not everyone’s dream is to have a baby, and because I have two boys, it doesn’t mean I HAVE to have a girl because I’m so girly. I get told that a lot. It’s really ok to ask me if I want more kids but to tell me I have to find someone to have a girl is just CRAZY talk.

{7} Compare. The comparison game is going strong these days but my biggest advice is to focus on yourself. I truly feel happy when others succeed, get married, have a baby, etc. I don’t compare (or try not to ) and focus on what my goals are and how to attain them. This has definitely helped me in blogging so I don’t get too overwhelmed what others are doing or have.

10 things women shouldn't do, Gibsons Italia chicago, chicago bloggers, Windy City bloggers, Jennifer worman, red soles and red wine, women support women, women support women quotes, life is a journey quotes, life quotes, life is a journey not a competition quotes, personal growth, reflect, self reflection, making friends as a woman, real talk, advice for women, support women, friendships with women, how to be a good friend

{8} Assume rather than communicate. Assume someone is snubbing you, assuming someone is being negative, assume someone is ok. Well, many things can be resolved by talking and friends, real friends, should ask “How are you doing?” and mean it and listen. This also pertains to online and looking at others, I recently heard another blogger claim someone else writes my blog and I couldn’t stop laughing. UMM, do you read my blog, how does someone else write about my divorce or struggles.  I’ve been doing this for 8 years, it is all me and I do have a graphic artist help me with PDF’s, but I write it all!

{9} Feel selfish for taking care of themself or make others feel selfish for doing so. The guilt game we put on ourselves or others is often felt. I’ve heard it, I’ve seen it, and I do not like it. Yes, I color my hair, get my nails done, put on makeup, get pretty every day, but that has no bearing on whether or not I’m a good mom or person. I just take care of myself. I honestly, don’t care if someone thinks I’m being selfish by doing this, I think typically it’s their problem. I often tell my friends to take care of themselves. From taking an hour away to rest or read or a weekend away. Self-care (in any way you need) makes you a better person overall! Feel good and you’ll be great.

{10} Judge other people’s relationships or marriages. The past few years I’ve learned more about marriage and relationships than ever. I guess when I went through a divorce, and me being the open book I am, I’ve become somewhat of a listener to other’s who are having issues. Things are not always what they seem and everyone struggles. Marriage is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, so I’m truly empathetic to everyone who goes through struggles. And I’m quite open, if you have an open relationship or know certain things, and you are HAPPY, good for you. Do what works for you. I have no judgment on you as long as you are ok and happy. Too many times was I told to stay with my ex, to not change my life or my favorite was when an ex-friend told me to stop talking about it and just get a divorce. Listening is everything and being supportive. At the end of the day, someone else’s relationship has nothing to do with me so all I wish for others is happiness.   I mean, that’s all I want for myself as well.

10 things women shouldn't do, Langham Chicago pink suite, chicago bloggers, Windy City bloggers, Jennifer worman, red soles and red wine, women support women, women support women quotes, life is a journey quotes, life quotes, life is a journey not a competition quotes, personal growth, reflect, self reflection, making friends as a woman, real talk, advice for women, support women, friendships with women, how to be a good friend

I am so grateful for these beautiful ladies! Follow along with them below:

@drkiarraking @angelmhou @bigblondehair @cranberrytantrums @aivanelli @andrealevoff @allepierce @catiekeogh @julzchez @brownskinbeautiful_ @shirley

Sometimes things happen in a week that makes me think about how we treat each other and I’m continually trying to improve myself.  I take situations and turn them into blog posts and hope we can treat each other better in friendships, life and in our careers.

Jennifer worman, red soles and red wine, women support women, women support women quotes, life is a journey quotes, life quotes, life is a journey not a competition quotes, personal growth, reflect, self reflection, making friends as a woman, real talk, advice for women, support women, friendships with women, how to be a good friend

Share:

Leave a Reply