About Me: Romantic Stories and Ideas

As we approach Valentine’s Day, I am always reminded of my past experiences, relationships, and things my dates/boyfriends/husband have done for me. Since I’m a romantic at heart, I have some good ones that will hopefully bring you ideas (or your partner’s ideas). If not ideas, it might give you a good laughable read and yes, there are romantic men out there!

I have been pretty lucky in love. I don’t regret past relationships and learn from each one. I find men just as sensitive and emotional as women and sometimes more sensitive but more ego-driven. As I dive into these stories, these are a few different people I’ve had long term relationships with, so the credit can’t be given to just one man.

At the end of this post is something I’ve never spoken about but wanted to share as things aren’t always what they seem.

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*This is at the Ice Castles in Wisconsin. It is a must-visit (so gorgeous).

I’m giving each guy initials to make it easier, not even close to their real names initials:). These were the 4 major relationships that drove these romantic experiences.

C was the most romantic guy I ever met. I met him in college and started dating him my senior year. He was 4 years older and had a career, a nice car, and owned his own place.  He literally swept me off my feet. But controlling.

G. was harder to read. He was a quiet romantic and won me over the first few years. His thoughtfulness was more day-to-day.

A. was my first everything. My first love. A great memory of my past and we stayed friends for a while.

N. also very romantic, thoughtful but a little unstable at times. He was a big dreamer and sentimental.

In between were a bunch of smaller relationships, most of these men were very kind, our life goals were different or  I wasn’t ready to be in a long term commitment.

{1} I got flowers every single week delivered to my door for months. And throughout our relationship, he would have delivered these HUGE arrangements. Beautiful and with thoughtful notes.  I love flowers so I still love this gesture from anyone I date!

{2} On my 3rd date with one of them, he surprised me with a trip to Vegas. A weekend filled with fun, food, and we got to know each other. After this date, we were together for years.

{3} For my birthday (maybe it was Christmas), I received jewelry and a hot air balloon ride gift! When we went on the hot air balloon ride, he took photos of us and put together an album of our experience. This was probably my favorite thing we did, but it was very early on in the relationship.

MacDuggal dress

{4} Songs and poems were written for me. I have kept a few.

{5} I am not a morning person and one guy always let me sleep in and would bring me coffee daily. It wasn’t until we broke up that I realized how much I appreciated the coffee and the breakfast in bed at times.

{6} One of my boyfriends lived in a different city. I mentioned that I needed a hair cut but didn’t think anything of it. Well, when I went to visit him, he surprised me the next day and said I booked you a haircut appointment (I trusted him, he had expensive taste). When I went to check out, he had already paid for it!

{7} One guy wrote me long letters. I threw them away a few years ago and now regret it. They were so sweet.

{8} Post-it’s that would say I love you in his home when I visited.

{9} When I first moved to a new city with him, I walked by the Louis Vuitton store. I never had a designer bag or shoes and when I walked by the window, I admired a pair of heels. For Christmas, he gifted me not only the heels, but he bought me my first little Louis bag (that I still have). He was a great listener when it came to gifts. He noticed little things and was full of surprises.

{10} I love candles and flowers, one of them would surprise me with things each time he saw me. Perfume, flowers, candles, wine. I love these things. I’m spoiled I know (as you read to this point).

{11} Many of them have surprised me by taking me to restaurants I love.  Can you tell I love surprises and gestures? One, surprised me with a cute table in the corner, with our names on it and a bottle of champagne.

{12} Rose petals, candles, and dinner inside our home.

{13} I got a good morning love email every single morning when he got to work.

 

{14} I would receive gifts of jewelry or handbags because he just wanted to. It wasn’t for any holiday or birthday in particular.

{15} Since I traveled for work a lot, before a trip, he gave me headphones, a backup iPhone charger, a book, and a neck pillow.  I still have all of it.

{16} He would show up at my work and have lunch with me. Such a simple thing, but I enjoyed our lunchtimes together.

{17}  One BF would help me clean my home for no reason at all. Such a small thing, but thoughtful. Maybe not romantic but us moms or single ladies all know this is amazing.

{18} For an anniversary, one of the guys did a surprise scavenger hunt. At each key location was a gift. The gifts were photos of us at key times in our relationship and in the last spot, he had a picnic spread and gave me a Chanel watch. Yes :), this is a real story and very thoughtful.

As you can tell, I’m a romantic. I love sentimental gestures, presents, and thoughtfulness. Probably at this point in life, my expectations are high which can be a problem. Along with these gifts though is the importance of how someone is treated.

Some more ideas for you guys (or pass this along to your boyfriend or husband):

(1) Hire my friend Elise (@chicfromchicago) to do a picnic inside your home. She can help any guy plan anything, so she is a great resource. She always helps me with my parties.

(2) Surprise her/him with a dinner/candles. Cook or order a favorite and have it ready before they get to you or have them stay away from the kitchen for an hour :).

(3) Send lunch/dinner without being prompted to their home (we are all home right now with covid)! My friend Tanya did this to me and I loved it.

(4) Make a card/post it and leave it in spots they will see. Put notes into their pockets.

(5) Staycation in your city.

(6) I believe theatres are renting out to individuals – how cute to rent a movie theatre room and treat your significant other to their favorite movie.

(7) A bottle of wine/champagne, snacks, flowers, and candles for a movie night in.

(8) Send a message/text every day on what you love about them.

These are just some ideas that come to mind that don’t cost too much and are doable. I, of course, love being swept away for a weekend, but this year and last has been a lot harder :). I’ve booked trips as well for my boyfriends/husband. I love giving as well and depending on whom it is, I listen and try to figure out what they love. Some men need acts of service, some need affection/touch, some need words of affirmation. I  try to give appreciation as much as possible. I know that I wasn’t as good at this with my ex-husband and that was a big learning for me. I give a lot now and am a huge planner. I, also, love appreciation but expect it in gestures, gifts, and how I am treated.

I try to be thankful daily.

At the end of the day, each woman or man needs something different. Listening, understanding, and giving someone what they need is a key part of a relationship. Some people may never need any of the above romantic gestures. But do it once and see what happens!

As for the last thing I wanted to add. Not to be negative, but sometimes the most romantic men are also the angriest. They hold a lot of emotion on both sides. I do not want to call out a particular guy(s), but I definitely experienced emotional abuse which was weighted with romantic gestures. It was very loving at times but then filled with degrading comments on who I was.  I’ve worked through it now, but at times, I still find myself remembering things said. My strength, confidence, and willingness to move forward is based on my past experiences.

I do not put up with much BS now.  When I see signs of anger, lack of self-awareness, too much emotion on both sides, or they blame me for everything, I have to run. I’m not saying I don’t have faults, oh I do. I spend a lot of time working on myself these days and the past 3 years.  I still get upset about things, but I also let go of things a lot quicker than ever before. Being romantic or thoughtful does not make up for treating someone right daily or during arguments. Arguments are normal, you learn about each other, and you can learn to work together to meet in the middle. Find someone who wants to grow and work with you. That’s what a partnership is.

As we quickly approach this love day, remember that your single friends, mom, dad, etc. can be your Valentines! You don’t need someone to feel special.  I will always love romantic gestures and am thankful to these men that have given me these memories. Whether or not it ended on a positive or negative note, I always choose to be grateful to have had the experience overall.

If you loved this post, don’t miss more personal updates and stories about me here.